Noah came down with the Mork from Ork sore throat on Saturday night. You know the one that comes with horrible referred pain in your ear when you swallow? The only relief is to stick your finger in your ear and apply significant pressure…every time you swallow…which happens a lot. It’s a goofy gesture that is reminiscent of something Mork would do. Shazbot indeed! My Mom named this malady back in the late 70′s when I would come down with a Mork from Ork a few times each year. The doctors have a less technical name for this affliction: Strep.
So, as Dave and I were getting ready to go see Tropic Thunder aroun 7:00 p.m., I watch Noah pull the Mork maneuver demonstrated above. The sitter had yet to arrive so I did what every mother who hasn’t been out in over three weeks would do. I dosed him up with Motrin and high-tailed it out of the house. Great movie.
But what’s comes around climbs into your bed at 3:00 a.m. with a raging fever, and swollen glands at which point you become Dr. Mom, MD, and triage expert extraordinaire. As your husband remains in a deep coma, you provide more Motrin, a cold cloth for the head, and you start amoxicillin because you NEVER finish the ten day dosage from the last time the kid had strep. I have a pretty good stash….you know in case of a homeland emergency…or a Sunday.
The next morning I call our pediatrician anyhow because she should probably prescribe a fresh set of orange pills.
Me: Noah has a really bad sore throat, a fever of 101, and ear pain. I’m giving him Motrin. Can we get him started on antibiotics? I have the pharmacy number right….
Doc: No, we really should see him and do a test. We don’t want him to build up a resistance unnecessarily. It could be viral. Just keep him on the Motrin and I’ll see him tomorrow.
Me: It’s strep. I know. Its classic (I didn’t use the Mork terminology as I didn’t think it would help my credibility as a member of the medical community.)
Doc: Just wait. It’s better for him.
Me: (grumble)
We waited. I stopped the contraband dosage. Noah suffered. And yesterday morning, the rapid strep test came back positive. I felt bad that my kid had to deal with it 24 hours longer than necessary but I suppose the doctor knows best. At least he got the control of the family room remote – that made him happy. His brother, not so much.
Chase: Why does Noah get the remote? You are being sooooo much better to him!
Me: He has STREP THROAT.
Chase: When do I get a turn with the remote??
Me: On Wednesday. When you come down with it. Promise, my love.
Nanoo. Nanoo.
