Despite the fervent arguments made by nurture-over-naturists in the 1970s, I think it’s clear to everyone now that yes, Virgil and Virginia, gender differences definitely do exist, and to deny this basic fact is to invite mockery from even the most liberal of your friends.
Having been a girl in guy-land all my life, here is a short list of stuff males love, based solely on my own personal observations. Individual experience may vary.
The Three Stooges. As my friend Eileen says, “I can’t enjoy Curly, Moe and Larry. I watch them create chaos and wreak havoc, and all I can think is, somebody has to clean up that mess!” Even though the mess was made 70 years ago, and cleaned up by some young production assistant who grew up, grew old, and is now dead, it still makes Eileen nervous. And I agree with her.
Monty Python. I chuckle at only a small portion of their japery, while all about me my males are laughing their heads off.
Matches, candles, passing hands through candle flames, learning to pinch out candles with enspittled fingers, mastering the art of re-lighting a wick by touching a match to the smoke of the extinguished wick, dipping fingers in melted candle wax, peeling off the fake fingernails and finger tips, making wax balls, throwing wax balls, everything but learning to remove the dripped wax from the table linens.
Fireworks. Pyromania + loud bangs + risk = fun, pleasure, and happiness.
Spatter patterns and explosions of any sort - Mentos in Diet Coke, a water balloon thrown from the roof, rocks skipped into water. See above.
Checking out expensive cars. While I identify cars solely by their color, my husband and sons know the makes, the models, and the years of autos blurring past on the highway. See also: “rims,” which are important to males, and have something to do with tires.
Car chases in movies.
Auto shows.
Beer.
Liner notes. Some of my dear women friends (Linda!) love to read liner notes, but from my perch, this seems to be mostly a guy thing. Also largely a thing of the past, what with I-tunes.
Sports and its attendant trivia.
Thankfully, my book club is meeting tomorrow night and I will get an antidote to all the testosterone coursing through this house. Then again, we’ll be discussing The Road, which is about….a man and his son. On an odyssey through a world that has been destroyed. By males.
