Yesterday I had an article published on Babble.com. I continue to be very proud of all the pieces I write for this site because it seeks to tell the real side of parenting. Yesterday’s article is about working from home. There is also a handy dandy quiz (which I put together with the help of my friend, employment attorney, and doctor of psychology extraordinaire Mo) to see if you are well suited to work from home. Try it – it’s fun.
The two pieces are a bit more buttoned up than some of my previous Babble articles so I thought the MoB readers might appreciate some of the sentiments that did not make it into the article – the outtakes if you will. So, here are the Top 10 little known facts about my work from home life:
10. My biggest recurring fear is that my dog will begin to bark in the middle of a conference call with the national media. If that ever happens, I will blame someone else on the call.
9. Working from home allows me to eat lunches that I would be too embarrassed to eat at the office in front of people. Like a slab of baby back ribs or an overstuffed cold meatloaf sandwich that drips ketchup out the sides of the bread onto my keyboard.
8. I am insanely neurotic about my computer. I don’t let anyone touch it. If Dave or the kids begin typing on the keys, I feel physically violated. Seriously. I have issues.
7. Of all the things I miss about working in an office, I think I miss the idle gossip the most.
6. When I tell people I work from home, I have an uncontrollable urge to explain that I really work ALL day at a job that requires some experience and a unique skill set. And that I am not taking orders for online catalogs (not that there is anything wrong with that.) Sometimes my ego is the hardest working part of my psyche.
5. I do not save money on work clothes. Because I only see my colleagues once or twice a month I don’t like to wear the same outfit twice in a season, lest they think I only have four dresses. So I buy new clothes at an embarrassing rate. Men do not have this problem.
4. Due to circumstances beyond my control I have taken a business call naked. Those on the other end of the phone never knew. And you never will.
3. The time I have saved by NOT commuting over the last nine years equates to about six months. I probably used half of this time wisely. MoB would probably not be part of my life if I commuted. Not commuting has removed a million pounds per square inch of pressure from my brain. That is more important to me than the $17,000 I have saved in parking fees.
2. Sometimes, Dave will wander into my office when I am goofing off on Facebook, TMZ or Grooveshark. When this happens, I quickly toggle to a work page and furrow my brow so as not to give myself away. He thinks I work really hard.
1. One of my most humble work from home moments happened when Chase was incessantly trying to get my attention while I was on the phone. But I was deep in conversation and after about 10 minutes I angrily frog marched him out the door and closed it behind him. A minute later he pushes a note under the door that read, “The dog threw up under you chair. Just wanted you to know.”