It’s Sunday night and Chase is taking a reluctant shower. Getting him in is difficult; then getting him out is difficult. But he is a happy boy in between. Either Dave or I will usually stick in the general vicinity of the bathroom when Chase is showering as there is inevitably some urgent need that results in him screaming as if the water has turned to blood. But more often than not, he has soap in his eyes.
So Dave and I are moving swiftly around the second floor packing for our separate Spirng Break trips, me to San Francisco for work; he and the boys to Rhode Island where I will meet them later in the week. As we pass each other in the hall way Dave is smiling for the first time that evening as we have been seriously focused on the monumental task at hand. I smile back at him.
“What?” I ask.
“Chasey’s singing ‘Let My People Go’ in the shower.”
I move stealthily towards the bathroom and stand outside, not wanting to interrupt the sudsy soul session. And sure enough, he is belting out this Sunday School favorite in his deepest voice possible.
When Israel was in Egypt’s land
LET MY PEOPLE GOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
I can’t remember the last time I sung a song in the shower. I was probably his age but I do remember how much fun it was. And how your voice always had a rock star quality when echoing off the tiled walls. Chase was really giving it his all without any sense that we were listening. There are moments in my life when I think, I couldn’t possibly love this kid any more than I do right now. This was one of them.
But as I listened to my child’s unbridled solo, I was overcome with complete dread for earlier in the weekend, Dave and I had made a no-turning-back decision that promises to change us all as individuals and as a family. And I couldn’t help thinking, “What the hell have we done?”
(To be continued on Thursday)