Like many of you I’ve followed the Occupy movement with sense of curiosity and befuddlement.  In solidarity with the protesters, I share the sentiment that something is not quite right in America these days.  But that’s where my camaraderie ends.  Because – hellooooo – life has never been fair and the 99 percent have always gotten the short end of the stick since time began.  Call me a (gulp) Republican but these folks really need to stop the whining, the encampments, and the quickie, on-the-spot marriages to some other lost soul they met yesterday and get on with their lives. 

Note to protesters:  You are not the 99 percent.  You are the 1 percent of Americans goofy enough to sleep out in tents on city streets with no bathrooms or running water for longer than….. 8 minutes.

Many observers suggest that the Occupy movement lacks a cohesive message and I wholeheartedly agree.  It has a great brand which has gotten a ton of free publicity without paying a dime to overpriced consultants.  But the protesters fragmented messages have squandered every opportunity to effect real change.  As a (gulp) PR professional, I might offer the following advice:  Find a narrow cause and apply the crap out of the Occupy brand to make a difference.  Not sure where to look?  I’m way ahead of you.  Here are 10 causes where 99 percent of Americans suffer and one percent thrives:

  1. Occupy the First Class Lavatory
  2. Occupy Any Monty Python Movie
  3. Occupy Freshman Calculus
  4. Occupy Vegan Gluten-Free Sugar Free Cookies
  5. Occupy the First Row of a Movie Theater
  6. Occupy the Facebook “Poke” Feature
  7. Occupy Middle School
  8. Occupy the New York Yankees
  9. Occupy Anchovy Pizza
  10. Occupy the Occupy Movement Hype

These causes require no explanation.  If they did, they wouldn’t qualify as easily brandable Occupy Opportunities.   As for the execution of these events and how a group of people might go about getting their message out, I leave this to the protestors, who judging by the recent evictions may have some time on their hands to figure it out.

Happy weekend MoB readers!  Hope its productive!

Share and Enjoy:
  • Digg
  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter