I believe it was my brother-in-law who once told me that every Jewish holiday can be summed up in nine words:

They tried to kill us.  We won.  Let’s eat.

Passover, which we are currently on day 5 of 7, is no exception.  It is one of my favorite Jewish holidays as it is so rich with tradition. You have the Seder dinner… the four questions… the ten plagues… the afikomen… Elijah’s cup… brisket (if you’re lucky) … gefilte fish… god awful macaroons … and of course, matzah.

Passover celebrates the Jew’s freedom from slavery and exodus out of Egypt.  As the story goes, when the Pharaoh finally agreed to let us leave, we were in such a hurry (because he had reneged on his word before) that we fled before our bread had a chance to rise.  Today, modern Jews eat Matzah in place of leavened bread all week to remind us of our hasty flight.

My family loves Matzah.  Dave will buy a box and begin eating it before the holiday begins.  The brothers slather it with peanut butter and munch on it after school.  Eating Matzah ensures that we will remember what our ancestors endured for the sake of freedom.  It also ensures a full week of gut wrenching constipation.

They don’t call it the bread of affliction for nothing. I’m just saying.

I challenge the MoB readers to come up with another ethnic food that binds you up with the speed and efficiency of a box of this seasonal favorite.  After centuries of celebration, I’m surprised no enterprising Jew has come forth with a religiously and gastronomically acceptable alternative.  In fact, I’m done waiting for the future to happen.  Let it be known that I am now seeking a culinary partner to join me in my next business endeavor — Double Fiber Matzah (coming soon to a Trader Joes near you).  The time has come for tried and true traditions to meet modern conveniences.  Or to borrow a phrase from that traditional song favorite around our house:  Let my people go.

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