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Once upon a time, a group of six women had a get-away to the mountains of Pennsylvania. The vacation house was an item that two of the husbands had bid on at a silent auction several years ago. When the two families failed to coordinate their schedules and find a time to use the house, we went to Plan B.
Book Club.
Nobody had ever been to the house or could even remember what it looked like in the photos at the auction.
We were in for a huge surprise. Too often, that line presages a great disappointment. But in this case, quite the opposite. The house was grand, recently built, and beautifully appointed, not full of cast-offs from the primary residence. It was Architectural Digest-worthy.
    During the drive up, all six of us in a mini-van heroically piloted by Kathleen (at right above, with Anne), we got started on the topic of colonoscopies. As Katie Couric has taught the nation, these are a good thing. Yet nobody really looks forward to the experience.
The bathroom theme continued at the vacation house, as we considered the oddities of our lodgings. There were only 4 wine glasses in the kitchen, but there were six and half baths, all gorgeously designed with slate floors and pristine subway tile. There were minimal closets and cupboards. Were the owners, possibly, teetotaling hygiene freak nudists? Whatever. They had great taste.
The place slept 20, and we all staked out our turf.
 When the subject of colonoscopies was mentioned for the nth time, we decided to rent Ghost Town, in which Ricky Gervais undergoes exactly that procedure, except it goes terribly awry…causing him to be pestered by ghosts with unfinished business.
 We did a lot of talking and fire-building and sleeping. We accomplished a 4-mile march in 7 degree weather. One advantage: when nature calls, at least you’re out in nature. But it was cold enough to literally freeze your heinie off. There was much hilarity as bathroom breaks were hastily undertaken in the middle of our own little Siberia. The hiking continued.
  After two miles, we summited. If only we had had a Book Club flag to plant.
 l-r: Jennifer, Anne, Christie, Kathleen, Lisa, Jenny
Throughout the weekend, there were variations on our theme. All long married, we are way past the broken heart stage. So instead, we told stories of broken toilets, and intestinal emergencies in the worst possible places at the worst possible times. There were countless tales of bathroom mishaps and misadventures from our own lives, and those of people who shall remain nameless. We were on a roll….of Charmin. Mike Myers and Mr. Whipple would have been so proud.
We laughed about a line I heard on NPR in which a humorist pointed out that when you’re in the bathroom at a place not your own, and there’s a knock on the door, you frantically say ”Someone’s in here!” Never “I’m in here.” As if distancing yourself from the base activity that is actually underway. We laughed until we cried, and some of the stories must never be shared. At least not on a blog.
 We may have been on top of the world, but our minds remained in the gutter. And that made for a truly perfect weekend.
When was the last time you laughed yourself silly, with tears streaming down your face?
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February 02, 2010
8 Responses received
Gale says:
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:17 am
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:17 am
I contend that women, when ensconced in a safe environment and far from judging outsiders, can go blow-for-blow against the men when it comes to gross and raunchy stories. I have a similar group of friends and I cherish them. Sometimes you just need to let your guard down. Sounds like a wonderful trip!
goofdad says:
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:24 am
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:24 am
I guess I’m lucky. With a family as large and extended as mine, it’s not an uncommon thing to be brought to tears of Joy! With 4 teens, some tweens, and the WWW thrown in for good measure, humor is always available to keep us going. Here’s a couple recent ones:
Going out for lunch with my sister and sharing the latest stories of my kids, her cats, and the family … just the normal stuff, but we were laughing so hard we were drawing stares from the other people in the brew-pub.
Playing D&D with my son Julian a couple weeks ago, the banter between him and his best friend was so suprisingly funny I actually blew a mouthful of soda out my nose and all over my papers in front of me … haven’t done that since High School!
And, to top it off, Well Read Hostess’ blog entry on “Things that go WTF in the night” (http://wellreadhostess.com) did it to me in the middle of my office yesterday afternoon when I found her site for the first time. The entry was good, but the title … Pure Gold!
Elizabeth says:
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:27 am
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:27 am
Last time I laughed myself silly? Not recently enough. In fact, I couldn’t tell you the last time. It sounds like a really fun weekend! And that is SO true about frantically yelling, “Somebody’s in here!”
lindacopy says:
February 2nd, 2010 at 12:13 pm
February 2nd, 2010 at 12:13 pm
This is great! I love the line about taking a bathroom break while hiking: “when nature calls, at least you’re out in nature.” Sounds like a super fun weekend and the perfect location for a Detrol commercial. Good going, girls (and I mean that in more than one way)!
skellie says:
February 2nd, 2010 at 1:16 pm
February 2nd, 2010 at 1:16 pm
Jennifer you have come a long way! I remember when you couldn’t tolerate bathroom humor. After so many years of diaper duty, anyone would be desensitized. On another subject, your destination does NOT remind me of the place you found in the Village Voice for celebrating a friend’s birthday in the Berkshires. (Was that her 30th? Twenty years ago, wow!) It had its own kind of charm. I doubt we had any wine glasses at all, but I remember drinking from coffee mugs with handles broken off. Also pulling a blanket from a high closet shelf and being showered with dry dog food left from the previous user of the mangy hairy blanket. We probably laughed til we cried that weekend!
Anne H. says:
February 2nd, 2010 at 2:59 pm
February 2nd, 2010 at 2:59 pm
Skellie, funny thing actually, Jennifer shared the story of that long ago weekend in the Berkshires this past weekend on our trip.
Jennifer thank you for so eloquently capturing the warm but silly spirit of our fun weekend. And yes, we did discuss the book (sorta)
Kristen @ Motherese says:
February 2nd, 2010 at 8:20 pm
February 2nd, 2010 at 8:20 pm
Does it indicate that my life could use a little more color if I admit that the last time I laughed really, really hard was when I read this line?:
“When you’re in the bathroom at a place not your own, and there’s a knock on the door, you frantically say ”Someone’s in here!” Never “I’m in here.” As if distancing yourself from the base activity that is actually underway.”
Anne says:
February 3rd, 2010 at 6:30 pm
February 3rd, 2010 at 6:30 pm
What an incredibly fun-sounding weekend. It’s been too long since I’ve had a girl-weekend where I laughed like that. My husband is funny…but not girlfriend funny.
